August 24, 2005

where you at shark?

Ok - I have been too busy to post. I know i know i said that it didn't take that much time and everyone who said i had too much time on my hands was right and i'm sorry. you freaking update it then. you try working, helping plan a wedding and move in the same month. The wedding is coming fast like cole trickle and we are going to be rocking brooklyn soon. I took off the password and hope that shady folks have left the building. Also, sharkblog is going away - WHAT YOU SAY? yes - sharkblog will be moving to a new domain very soon, bigger, better! my blog will evolve as my life does.. after the wedding i will be rocking a new domain... and all i can say right now is cheddar biscuits to that!

Posted by Patrick at 04:59 PM | Comments (2)

July 17, 2005

Brooklyn here we come!

I know you are bummed I haven't been blogging lately. I could make a lame excuse, like working 12 hours a day, wedding crunch time (2 months from today!) and having to find a place for us to live, but you don't want to hear that. Posts will get shorter and will contain more pictures. The good news is this weekend, we got to get away for one day to babylon, long island and meet up with friends. We hit the boat and did some beaching it and clam digging on fire island. That place is a different world. On sunday we rushed back on the LIRR to go apartment hunting. Due to my recent office move and wanting more space we hit brooklyn. In 2 hours we found an awesome place, brownstone apartment w/ a roof deck, 1br + living room +dining room + a side office to geek out. We are in awe right now and will be living in the heart of cobble hill, brooklyn. Jeannine swears the street we are living on is right out of the cosby show. This answers the number 2 question we get from friends and family where you going to live after you get married? the #1 question is - how are the plans going? frankly, we are on target and are pretty well on our way!

Posted by Patrick at 11:16 PM | Comments (2)

July 05, 2005

Say it aint so ERNIE ANASTAS

Tonight i flipped through the channels and landed on fox news. In between, cars exploding, bullets flying everywhere, I see a new face on fox news, Ernie Anastas. Apparently, New Yorkers trust this guy so much, Fox paid him 2 million a year for five years to bring some credibility to the ten pm terror hour. I will now be very scared when Ernie Anastas tells me that iPOD thieves are hunting down blue ipods with a specific type of headphone and certain 99 cents downloads. I will miss you, ernie anastas. Sorry I won't be watching fox news at 10pm. You and Roz Abrams were a match made in heaven and you have left us on 2 with JEFF ROSENFIELD? Say it aint so ERNIE Anastas (i think that could be a band name)

Posted by Patrick at 11:26 PM | Comments (1)

July 01, 2005

Happy 1st b-day Bruce!

Happy b-day Bruce. I wish I could attend your b-day party this weekend but off to Boston on a BUS! Wedding budget planning 101.

Dad and Bruce at central park carousel.

Posted by Patrick at 07:23 PM | Comments (2)

June 25, 2005

The weirdest thing I've seen in manhattan

Today I saw the craziest thing i've ever seen in my days in manhattan. I saw a guy with a net walking down the street. He then ran and covered up a pack of pigeons on 46th street and then got picked up in a jeep. It was definitely not anyone official, like the pigeon patrol. It was a dude stealing pigeons for I have no clue what reason? Is this even legal? I know we hate pigeons but can you take them from their homes? strange. I shared a storry with my buddy this morning and he said he saw someone on the subway with a big black live spider in a zip lock bag around his neck. I guess the morale of the story is that I said this is the weirest thing, but the bar will be raised, maybee not next week but the following. that's nyc.

Posted by Patrick at 02:25 PM | Comments (1)

June 14, 2005

Survey says if you owned a Dodge Omni you are likely to succeed!

I have been doing an informal survey of people lately and asking them about some of the not so nice cars they and their family have owned. The most popular answer I get amongst the folks i hang with is the DODGE OMNI! now mind you I hang with very few hilton rich kid types. Answers also include Chevy Chevette, Pinto, pacers, Dodge Maverick, vw bugs with flinstone floors, ford escorts, ford tempos and Chevy Caprice Classics without hubcaps. Oh and don't forget my favorite, the 1980's toyota celica that my friend well's drove for 2 years with the heat on in the dead of summer so the engine wouldn't overheat. Then I take a look at the person and how successful they are and frankly all of them have done very well for themselves!I'm talking managers at fortune 500 companies, vice presidents, lawyers, doctors and nurses. The survey also found that you would make an additional hundred K if you saved up for a junk car and then were not allowed to bring it to college, forcing you to sell yourself for a ride on "the board:. little did you know you were building your sales skills.

Jeannine and I have had a total of 4 omni's in our lifetime and we are doing alright. 3 for my family and one for her that took all 6 family members on a summer vacation. 2 powder blue and 1 two tone red and grey fo me. This was my sister's first car. I remember it had no rear defroster, so we had to buy a fan that plugged into the cigarette lighter. Why does growing up having multiple onmi's and other POS cars lead to success? First, you probably won't obsess over cars, which are the silliest investment in the world. Second, if you ever have to pick up a date in a powder blue dodge omni, you better have something else going for you. If you count on just having a car the first time, you will learn real fast that personality matters. Finally, eventhough the omni is great in the snow and reliable, you will dream of bigger and better things. In my town the "cool guys", on their 16th birthday got the toyota truck with a roll bar (upstate nY), american racing wheels and a system. I got the hand me down omni and am truly thankful and proud. What junky car has left a major impression on you and started your path to the promise land?

Posted by Patrick at 06:19 PM | Comments (8)

June 09, 2005

Best Lobster Movie Ever!

Last night I had the honor of attending a movie screening at Tribeca Cinemas. A friend of a friend, wrote, directed and brought his family and friends to the screen, in The Lobster farm. I was truly blown away, by both this great story and the movie's star, Danny Aiello. Danny answered questions along with the writer/director Kevin Jordan, a future household name, after the screening. Danny took about $14 dollars a day to work on this film and showed up with legit hollywood friends. He truly seemed like a genuine guy who believes in young directors and of course, new york film making. The movie is based on Kevin's life, growing up in sheephead's bay brooklyn and working at the families Lobster Farm. Across the board there were magical performances, including Jane Curtin, Sam Freed, Daniel Sauli and of course bidder #1. Bidder #1 is a natural! I really hope you all get to see this movie at your local theater soon.

Posted by Patrick at 06:29 PM | Comments (2)

May 31, 2005

Scammed by the JUMBOTRON!

I am admitting to my readers that I have been scammed, suckered by the jumbotron at Yankee stadium. For the first time in my life, i had back to back yankees tickets this past week, thursday and friday. On thursday they showed this very interesting looking character, as if it was their interns running around filming it live for the jumbotron. The next day I saw him again and realized I was swindled. It continued to happen all night over and over - fans dancing to the wrong songs that were playing in the stadium. I am so gullible that I thought that LAME-O Cotton Eye Joe really was live from the production room. They have replaced hime with cotton eye JOEY who showed up live with the same exact moves both nights - scammed again. IF they lie to me about live cotton eye joe, what else do they lie about - what is in the hot dogs? the payroll? Don't play me like that and for that i'm not going to anymore back to back games, until you change to an only live fan on the jumbotron policy. So there, you have lost out on 4 beers and 2 hot dogs or $150 bones.

Posted by Patrick at 11:24 PM | Comments (0)

Proving that sharkblog is truly worldwide!

The reason why I and you should love blogs are their global reach. The world is growing flat with high speed communication and the online community. Proof is the email I got the other day from Anthony in Australia, pushing the product on the left. Since I am the world renown EXPERT on to-go coffee lids, he wanted to tell me about a new product out of Austalia. I could become a NICHE Coffee lid blog if i wanted to! It is called smartlid systems. It is the HYPERCOLOR of coffe lids. I hope you remember that reference if you grew up in the 80's. It tells you when the lid is on securely and changes color based on how hot the contents are. Will fresh too hot coffee show fire and print "WARNING: LAWSUIT HOT!". I am waiting for a trial of this lid to bring it to the sharkblog laboratory for an official test. They are getting free use of the laboratory with years of lid experience and free advertising. smartlids Rocks so far.

Look at this excerpt from their web site:

Imagine a coffee cup lid that was Smart enough to communicate to your client.
A lid that glowed when it was hot, warning the client and all other pedestrians when being transported.
A lid that informed your client when it was ready for them to drink.
A lid that warned your client that their beverage was too hot.
A lid that communicated to your client that their beverage was fast becoming too cold to drink.
A lid that showed that the lid had been correctly applied.
A lid that offered a new media for advertising and branding.
And a lid that could Speak every language in the world.

I only have one comment. I would target really fresh fancy coffee places. I don't think SHADY nyc deli's want to warn their client that the 2 day old coffee is too cold.

Posted by Patrick at 10:52 PM | Comments (1)

May 19, 2005

Sharkblog Laboratory is back!

People have been asking where the heck is the sharkblog laboratory and what have they been up to. Sure they did a deep analysis of beer inflation and coffee cup lids, (your favorite entry by the lame poll) but nothing since. Well the lab is back. If you read the coffee lid review and agree, you realized there is a need for coffee cup to go innovation. Dunkin Donuts is in the lead, but there is room for improvement. This week I feel proud because my entry has lead to innovation. I got a coffee from a fancy cafe this week and they offered me this lid

I was very excited by it. If you look it it. It has a cover over the spout that you can move back and forth to open and close. simple and innovative right? well let's bring it to the 400 square foot sharkblog laboratory and see how it did against those other lids in a spill off!!!

1) Regular lid (The ones where you flip the perforated top)
These lids are your basic lids. You can see below that when you flip it over coffee will go everywhere. This is with the perforated top covering the spout. Bad lid, bad

2) spout lid
Here is the spout lid that you will get at starbucks. I filled it to the brim and flipped it. if you flip it completely over, you get 0 spillage. Was i wrong to bash this lid? was i duked by science? then i flipped it on an angle and still very little spillage.

3) the new solo lid.
Check this out. I liked the lid at purchase but the lab reveals that this lid is a sham. It spills just as much if not more than the standard lid and 100% more than the lid that got a ZERO! The lab is never wrong. Note - this is with the lid closed shut! This lid is a joke. D an D is still ruling, while destroying the world with cfc floro carbons (not to mention those nuked egg sandwiches) This lid gets a -151 on the scale. Back to the drawing board!

Posted by Patrick at 06:25 PM | Comments (0)

May 16, 2005

A few HK Observations....

HK, hell's kitchen is a great place. I really have grown to love the neighborhood, for it's food, it's culture and proximity to everything. There are two things that limits it's ability to be the "it" neighborhood and that is port authority and the lincoln tunnel. I love jersey, but not their drivers rushing to the lincoln tunnel after a stressful work day, charging a yellow light in their lexus. The lincoln tunnel holds up traffic on 9th avenue all the way from 42nd to 57th between the west side highway to times square. There is also traffic all the way down to chelsea coming the other way. That is why I am so shocked that the folks against the west side stadium are not doing any advertising or flyers based on this very aspect. The traffic is miserable as it is and if i was going to live here for a long time or bought a place here i'd be piping mad. How about some creativity in the flyers. all they say is "rally against the west side stadium - stop bloomberg" come on, i want to see a flyer with a traffic jam, chaos, mayhem, all up 9th avenue with people yelling and screaming after a metallica concert. I want a commercial with the jets cheerleader guy drinking beer out of a helmet on 9th ave and cabs honking everywhere. even with all the mass transit there is always the guy from nj or westchester who says they know a shortcut to the stadium. I can not even imagine what traffic will look like on 9th avenue. look at the traffic on 17 for giant's stadium! It's crazy to picture - i hope they have a plan for that, but it's not about that.

The other hk observation i have is that you can spot a bunch of broadway actors going about their business on a daily basis. but the interesting thing i have noticed is the number of red headed actresses. You would think that would be a niche, not on broadway. there are about 10,000 ready and available to play dorothy. I'm sure it's not natural and that it's not flying with the casting folks.

finally, i'm watching the bachelor right now. yeah i admit it. I guess he is going to choose one of these ladies. I want to sign them up for the pre-cana we are in right now and see if they can make it through - it's like survivor and we are half way through and have not been voted off. We were told this week, when i tried to cut down the number of sessions, that the final meeting will consist of an "investigation" - oh my!

Posted by Patrick at 10:03 PM | Comments (1)

May 12, 2005

If I was hiring a spokesperson, I would hire.......

I love when product advertising and infomercials feature b list celebrities. Why? Because of the positive impact they have - you never forget them. Hello suzanne sommers is a gazillionaire, hasselhof could sell ice to the eskimos. I'm not talking about some of the stupid reality tv stars or the likes of butufuco. I'm talking former acting genius's like Eric Estrada. I am sold on hot springs village and my down payment is already in the hands of ponch. If sharkblog was around during the dot com boom and i had zero revenue streams and zero room for growth, but had tons of venture capitalist telling me to advertise, i'd go with the following b-list celebrities for my super bowl commercial. What the heck, maybee i can still get them and promote the sharkblog brand. maybee i'll approach them with a script based on their highest moments in their acting careers. Here are the three i would pick for my 3 commercials or print ads.

1) Michael O'Keefe

I would get the Danny Noonan for my ads and make him do a play on caddyshack with a red hat, shirt, carry rodney's golf bag. You read Sharkblog Danny? EVERYDAY!!

2) Either Rob Garrison or William Zabka

Rob Garrison played Tommy in Karate Kid and yelled the 2nd best line in a move ever - "put him in a body bag Johnny" He was also 2nd best in the Cobra Kai karate club. Tommy you are number 1 at sharkblog and my first choice. If Rob's not available then i'd go for johnny himself, William zabka. If zabka doesn't look like johhny then i get bart conner from another great hit RAD!!! movie of the year in 1986.

3) Dolph Lundgren

If the investors were really willing to put up the bucks. I'd go and pull dolph lundgren off the set of his latest sci fi tech showtime late night thriller cyborg alien pimp. You all know the line, especially if you hang out with me. it's a great line. if People ask you "hey where did dave go? and then say..if he die, he dies in a russian accent.. friends really get a kick out of it. It's a rocky 4 thing and one day i will prove my theory that there is a rocky movie on at all times somewhere in the world. Dolph would say to the competitors.. if the ##insert sharkblog competitor here## dies, they die...

Who would your spokesperson be for your madeup business?

Posted by Patrick at 05:33 PM | Comments (4)

May 06, 2005

DERBY TIME....

It's been a busy week, with hitting 30 years old and all. Had a kicking party last week with some mexican food and karoake. Great times. Well i wanted to give you all an insiders view of my picks for the kentucky derby. I have always loved the derby, since the days we went to visit my mom, who worked at otb, on derby day. And since i can remember picking horses I have always lost. Not even a show, not even an exacta boxed with 5 out of 8 horses.. So take my bets that will be placed at the shadiest of the shadiest otb's in nyc tomorrow. I have researched and researched and i am ready. Let's see how i do..

Picking 2 winners...
Spanish Chestnut - 50:1
afleet Alex - 9-2 Pick this horse it is a feel good story. Part of the winnings will go to a charity called Alex's Lemonade Stand.

Pick 3 exactas..

1)win Afleet alex and show noble causeway
2)win bandini and show sun king
3)win noble cause show high fly

Notice how i will not pick steinbrenner's horse in the exacta! you have other things to worry about buddy and your streak aint so good.

Pick 3 trifectas..
1) Afleet Alex show sun king place noble cause
2) bandini show afleet alex place bellamy road
3) noble cause show high fly place spanish chestnut

now get to otb and bet the opposite horses i pick.. i never even show up in these things. support education.. just do it!

In other news, i love when folks call and email me and say man you gots to write about this. I haven't been able to this week but my family, who are nj shore lovers, will now love the fact that when we go to cape may we can all wear speedo's. Thanks mike for keeping me in the know and let's pick up our bannana hammocks this week.

Posted by Patrick at 06:33 PM | Comments (0)

April 29, 2005

GOOGL

I was going to rip google for not ranking sharkblog.com high on their search engine, but then i found Google SMS. If you want movie times, addresses, stock quotes, directions all you have to do is send a text message to GOOGL on your cell phone with the Name and the zip and they respond back immediately. Now that is pretty cool!

Posted by Patrick at 05:48 PM | Comments (1)

April 28, 2005

Another Poll

Many folks come up to me and tell me about their favorite entry and proceed to tell me why... Since i am trying to break the 56 day blogging record, this is my entry for today. This will be interesting, so vote away! Click on the entry to get a refresher course.

Posted by Patrick at 07:27 PM | Comments (4)

April 26, 2005

Careless Whisper!

It's late but i am having trouble unwinding after a silly decision to go to watch Pedro vs Smoltz at shea, as opposed to seeing AROD blow up all over the Angels. Oh well - i'll take the hall of fame pitcher matchup anyday. I will say this about shea - you have true fans there. There are no corporate types just lots of die hards cheering until the end and of course booing when you make an out. Poor Matsui.

Over dinner last night at a chinese restuarant, Jeannine and I heard the instrumental version of Careless Whisper. And This is not the first time i've heard the instrumental version. Next time listen for it and you will hear it - it is everywhere! I proceeded to tell her that i would have to kick my own a$$ if it was my job to produce or play an instrument in an instrumental score of a wham song. Why do really bad 80's songs live have to live on and be reborn and ruin my hot and sour soup? Can someone explain why there are 21 versions of careless whisper that can be downloaded on itunes? My 2 readers across the pond - why did a UK radio station vote this song the greatest song of all time? Is George michael making 8cents every time we hear this crap? Can Apple release the names of the people who downloaded all 21 versions of the song and we can all give them a whooping? If you want to laugh and have itunes click on the sample of the spanish version. there is a regae version!!? Of course Kenny G found a way to profit off this

Posted by Patrick at 11:50 PM | Comments (0)

April 25, 2005

just some stuff for you non web surfers

Here are some real random links for you web surfers...

1) Funny video....

2) the chimp that can't quit smoking..

3) random hilarious facts about vin diesel..did you know? from one of my favorite blogs..

4) The funniest/scariest video of all - if it is true..

Posted by Patrick at 08:40 PM | Comments (0)

ZACH BRAFF INSPIRED $10 a DAY in NYC - HELL's KITCHEN PART 2

Alright you have been all waiting for the second installment of the popular series.$10 a day. This series is inspired by Zach Braff, who when he was a starving actor in the nyc, tried to eat every day for only ten bucks. Is it impossible? no way. This time I come way under budget and this allows for you the reader to decide how to spend that extra dough. I know i was going to do the West village second but i still need to practice before I can breakdown the barriers that exist between a hole and the wall and a $10 panini sandwich. If you remember the first entry, here are the rules.

The Rules:
- $10 for 3 meals in NYC
- You can't cook any of them
- Only one meal can be pizza or hot dogs
- Tap Water is cool by me
- No street vendors (Not that I don't love the dirty water dog)
- You won't be tipping on this day
- None of the places you can go can be rated by zagat!
- Lets add one - you have to sit for atleast one of them

Challenge: Complete the $10 challenge in Hell's Kitchen Part 2

Breakfast: SHADY DELI - 9th ave (corner of 45th) Take a look for yourself. Although this deli doesn't sell the darn post and force you to look at the daily news, while you wait, they offer value extroidanaire. Sure they don't have a name and will probably be shut down anyday now for health violations, but that's that's risk taking 101. They serve you an egg on a roll with coffee for a buck fifty. It doesn't say it but with cheese is the same price. The characters you will meet there are unmatched by any deli in the neighborhood. My favorite is when customers tell the guy at the counter how much they are going to pay.. "1 dollar for milk? all i gots is 50 cents and that will have to do"

Lunch: CHICKEN NATION!!! - 10th ave (corner of 47th) You can't miss the sign for this place and KFC WATCH OUT.. Chicken nation is one nation under chicken and breast meat for all. I want to write the slogan for them I want to be a part of the next great franchise. Chicken nation... a great place for the family... to have chicken! I tried to avoid this and head to one of my favorite taqueria's but i could not pass up the nation. They offer a great deal - The chicken breast platter w/ fries or rice is $4.50 and you get a mouthful! On the front of their menu right under their catchy slogan "great tasting chicken" it states tax included in prices. All they need now is a guy like Kenny from our college dining hall to yell when the food is ready " chicken wing pick it up DING! Sweet I'm heading to dinner with 4 bucks left.

Dinner - RUDY's - 9th ave between 44th and 45th All ny'ers know about rudy's. It is the dive bar in which dive bars are measured against. Now it is some sort of trendy hook up spot, but whatever. The best part of rudy's is the cheap beer and the second part is the free hot dogs! (not the jukebox) For $2.50 I am enjoying the beer amongst beers that is only trendy in staten island, Rheingold and a dog. I couldn't be happier. I even have $1.50 left. This can be spent at the old 99cents pizza place by port authority, get another draft at rudy's, head to time square for some souveineirs, or pick up some 2ply at the 99cents store. damm life is good!

Hell's kitchen conquered again - destroyed crushed.. prooving that there are still great values in nyc. Nyc is not the most expensive place on earth to live it is the best and as my dad always says "you can't eat the atmosphere" For part 3 i will hit a swanky nyc neighborhood. I will conquer and destroy the west village someday, until then i will enjoy $3 coffees.

Posted by Patrick at 07:36 PM | Comments (3)

What are your top mutilated song lyrics?

I thought I had a grand idea for a blog entry. How about a list of some of the misheard lyrics that my friends and I have held on to for many years. Genius right! Well I found out that there are no creative thoughts these days, cause this site already documented about a million of them, damm you amiright.com And of course the ones that I've carried on are already documented. Here they are anyway...

1) Drift Away... My entire life up until Jeannine recently pointed this out to me, I have been singing "Give me the Beach boys to free my soul, I wanna get lost in your rock and roll" better than give me the meat boys i guess.

2) Cruel Summer - BANANARAMA. I never got the karate kid soundtrack so I never realized the name of the song was in the lyrics. I went about 3 quarters of my life, which is closing in on 30 soon, singing it's a cruel cruel simon... Man that simon is so cruel why is he so cruel.

3) Beast of burden - Rolling stones... I never knew the pizza's burning.. That was from a friend but i thought it was rare, but still documented on amiright.com

What is your worst misheard lyric and how long did you keep it real?

Posted by Patrick at 07:18 PM | Comments (5)

April 22, 2005

Who's going with me!

I am looking for the first person to join me for a weekend in hot springs village for the road trip of a lifetime to arkansas. I love their move getting ERIC ESTRADA and i love the price. I love the people at hot springs village too it is the communitty of the future. i love arkansas. i love razorbacks. J9 we going next weekend?

Posted by Patrick at 05:07 PM | Comments (3)

April 15, 2005

wow i am a geek

I am doing a test and updating the site from my blackberry. If this works maybe I'll get better blog motivation. I'm in a blog slump similar to arod hitting. I want to give the answer to my poll that generated mucho interaction 2o people voted and u the people were right 75 people read this sell sellsell blog everyday. I don't even have to update it and u still come keep reading I'll be out of the slump soon

Posted by Patrick at 08:52 PM | Comments (0)

April 07, 2005

How bout a little interaction?

In order to get a little more interaction on the site. I'm asking you to play a guessing game. I used to always love that game in school guess how many jelly beans are in this jar.

I will reveal the winning answer next week. People who read and don't comment please just do it! I would like to use this format when i get what i call bloggers block. Although, this has to be a form of blog cheese.

Posted by Patrick at 06:32 PM | Comments (0)

Lessons Learned from a cell phone loss and Will I be the same person post-blackberry?

I've never had a nice cell phone. I always get the "sign up for another year and get this crappy phone free" phone. One of my phones I operated without a working screen for a good amount of time. I could only call my friends who were the first entry for each letter. My last phone was two tone because they replaced the phone but not the battery of a different color phone. This phone had no annoying ring tones, no camera phone, no internet but was functional until it met dollar rental cars last weekend!. I have a quick conversation in the car after j9 and I pick it up and proceed to put my cell in the cup holder. Unknown to me the cup holder was filled with a windex type solution. I powered up my phone and it literally fried. I've been without a cell phone and I've learned a few things. First of all, you can survive w/o a cell phone. I felt naked initially but now i am free. Free of it in my pocket, free from calls while trying to order a sandwich and free of people being able to find me. Second I learned that i don't get many calls, except from Jeannine. what happened? no love out there anymore come on i'm fun to BS with call me. I've also learned my fiance's phone number for the first time, which i bet could come in handy down the line. hey, tonight i may even use a pay phone. I'm meeting up with a friend and i can't use call me when you are close. No i said you be at the place at 8:15 or else i'm ditching you. Life is good w/o cell phones. Finally, you lose a lot when your cell phone melts - i've lost all your numbers so email me with your number or don't expect a call from me. So what's next for me? I have been told by work i am going blackberry. I'm actually practicing with my thumbs right now to be quick on the email. Will i be that jackass walking down the street on my blackberry laughing? Will i become striped shirt guy?(if you haven't read this it is hilarious and obscene) I will be going from pay phone to being completely connected and this scares me. Wish me luck. And if i change someone atleast call me to tell me
i've changed since freshman year. (even if you didn't know me freshman year)

Posted by Patrick at 05:57 PM | Comments (3)

My Anthems

I was making a playlist for my mp3 player and I was thinking about my anthems. What are anthems? These are songs that give you that extra kick when you need it. When I need that extra kick i crank up to 11 with these songs

1) Times Like These - Foo Fighters
2) BLUE SKY - ALLMAN Brothers - Probably the greatest song EVER!
3) TEENAGE Wasteland - the WHO
4) Land of hope and dreams - Springsteen - I don't think this was ever officially released except on the nyc live album.
5) Shortest STRAW - Metallica - Preps me for all those street fights
6) SoulShine - Government Mule
7) Never mind the strangers - Saw Doctors - Irish roots catch up with me with music and at the bar.
9) Sweet Pain - Blues Travelers - AMAZING SONG
10) Holes to heaven - Jack Johnson
11) soft serve - soul coughing - one of the best bands ever!

Here are some Rap Anthems
12) 99 Problems - JAZ-Z - I got 99 problems but jeannine aint one!
13) Juicy - BIGGIE - baby BABY! RIP BIGGIE if you don't know well now you know..
14) Still Not a Player - big pun - RIP big pun you still crush a lot
15) The Sounds of Science - Beastie - Off the greatest album ever. Dropping science like galeleo dropped the orange. Amazing samples of the beatles.

Cheese
16) PYT - MJ - Hate to admit but it move a my feet. Brings me back to when my parents let me stay up to watch friday night videos to catch the moonwalk. don't deny it you did it too.

Local Flavor
17) SWM - Conehead buddha - If you went to Clarkson w/ me i dragged you to one of their shows. They are still living on the web.
18) Things to avoid - BROTHERs of industry - These guys rock and i kind of know them and stuff.

Well i'm getting tired of free party poker being the only comments on the web site - what you think of my anthems? anything i missed.

Posted by Patrick at 05:30 PM | Comments (10)

March 23, 2005

Back in CALI-FORNIA

Sorry for the no blog activity, but I am back in CALI. This time in LA. For the first time I drove on the 405 and must say wow I wish I was in the oil business. I've never seen so many cars and smog in my life. They talk about the traffic all the time but it is no joke. What's funny is that when I am on the west coast i have no blog inspiration.. oohh traffic in la, never heard that one before... ooh a play on the OC theme song and LL Cool J... I guess that makes NYC the place for me and I really miss everything about it. Sure it's not sunny and laid back but it's home and I can't wait to get back.

Posted by Patrick at 10:58 PM | Comments (0)

March 16, 2005

The dog days of graffiti

From the same brilliant people that brought us "Please Curb your Dog", are the recent "Keep your dog away from my overpriced specialty shop" sidewalk stencils. When I did some research, I found out that Forty seven tons of dog poop is deposited on the sidewalks and streets of New York every day. Half of that does not get picked up by the dog owners. Hey I'm not one to argue here that dog's don't make sense in the city, but it's a fact of life here and as a business owner you need to deal with it. You know I didn't ask you to put out a flower pot for me to trip over after a few beers. Half of you don't even put anything in the flower pot. Also, if you are going to do some stencil graffiti - get it right man and hire the street smart experts. Look at these darn stencils. It's as if they give it to their 1st grader as a take home assignment. One of these looks like a hammer head on a dog's body. Is this even legal? It seems like bernie goetz vigilante dog law writing. Finally, as a store owner you take responsibility for the sidewalk, eventhough you don't own it. All you have to do is take a few minutes out of your day and wash the sidewalk and all will be good. One of these places is a wine store. You would think a wine store would embrace lonely dog owners - seems like a high potential customer to me. I like right next store to the angry wine store owner where there is a free watering hole for dogs. If I were a dog i'd fill up right before walking by the wine store.. We all know what Triumph would say on this one.. This beautiful portrait of disproportional dogs is nice.... for me to poop on!

Posted by Patrick at 06:35 PM | Comments (0)

March 06, 2005

Going Back to CALI....... CALI.....

While all my pals and fam is back east freezing, i'm soaking up the sun on my pale skin in San Diego! I was complete tourist guy today, taking a trolley tour and my camera. Great town and really has changed since i was here in high school. The downtown is condoville and they put a nice baseball stadium smack in the middle. Cali is a strange place to me.. very laid back and beautiful but doesn't feel like home. I guess I wouldn't have anything to complain about here so i wouldn't like it. I had to ditch into a bbq dive bar where Top Gun was filmed last night to feel at home. My plane ride here was ridiculous. I booked with us airways, when i got to the gate they told me it was us airways operated by united airlines. I had to walk all over LGA. Then it was cancelled so i had to re-route through denver.. Nightmare and now i know why both united and us airways are sinking fast. On a final note I ran into that native american flute band playing and selling their cd - wow those guys get around the whole country. I saw them rock time square just last week. Stay Warm!!!

Posted by Patrick at 09:36 PM | Comments (0)

March 05, 2005

Alarm Clock Technology Advancement is needed!

Isn't it amazing that we have nanotechnology, can clone sheep and send videos from our phones, but an alarm clock still can't tell that you are not in the room after an hour! I would like to thank my neighbor for setting their alarm clock for 8am on a saturday and then leaving for the weekend! I would also like to thank the downstairs neighbor for leaving their dog, who heard the alarm clock and barked to the beat. The most you can spend on an alarm clock is 179 bucks. We need new alarm clocks that do some simple logic. If you do not wake up in 15 minutes you are either really hung over or not there.

Posted by Patrick at 09:30 AM | Comments (2)

February 28, 2005

Vote for some mates across the pond!

Hey sharkblog readers. A great friend from college, elisabeth Schuchman, needs your help. After college she left for a job in England and she's been there ever since. She's married to a great musician who will soon be tearing up ipods across the world. Here's some more info from shuchman.

Hi All
I need your help...Wayne is a finalist in the National Student Music
Awards for the UK, but he needs votes to get to the final three. This is the same contest Coldplay won that broke their career so if you all get voting...I could be the next Gwyneth...OK so that's a stretch, but you know what I mean! It's really easy so if you could pass it on to all your email pals and get them voting, the band would be much obliged!

Go to www.nsma.com
Click on UK
Click on Vote
Enter your email address then press Go and NSMA will send you an email(hotmail may go to junk mail so don't forget to check.)
When you get the email click "vote now" and vote for JIMMI JUKKA!

They only take one email per address, and you have until the end of
March.

Feel free to check out his website where there is a short MP3 of their single "Captains Table" if you want to have a listen.
Thanks very much!!!
Elizabeth

Posted by Patrick at 08:23 PM | Comments (1)

February 27, 2005

My New York City Stadium Plan

After the huge success of "the gates" I have submitted my proposal to the city to resolve the west side stadium debacle. I have ended the bitter feud between cablevision and bloomberg. Also, my plan will allow for the west side rail yard to be converted into lots of high rise buildings for rich people. If rich people are happy, everybody is happy! My plan calls for moving the stadium to the great lawn of central park. We aren't allowed to walk or protest on the great lawn, so lets put the J-E-T-S..Jets.Jets.Jets there. I went to a Dave Matthews concert on the great lawn and I hurt my back because i had to sit on a blanket. Boy I could have used a nice stadium seat. Another time i went to the great lawn to listen to great tenors. Well, we ran out of cheese and wine at our picnic.. and i was like. i could use the beer guy right now selling $12 beers! This also solves the olympic 2012 issue. Don't put the stadium in queens and make me take the 7 train! anything but that. In order to get approval from the central park conservationist people, I will be offering shuttle service to a great park upstate, Fahnestock. I mean do we really need the whole central park? I feel that the benefits such as bringing high paying vendor jobs, binge drinking and tailgaiting far outweigh any damage that will be done to the park. I'm waiting for bloomberg's approval on this - but it's obvious to me. I will even paint the stadium safron for those who love the gates. stay tuned on how my proposal is going. Here is my rendition.

Posted by Patrick at 05:03 PM | Comments (0)

February 25, 2005

Shark and J9 Celebrity encounters

Living in nyc you can get into some unique celebrity encounters. I've had a couple of funny ones, but this is not page six. 2 of the brightest ones are captured below. One is me meeting knick legend John Starks at a book signing. I re-enacted "the dunk" for everyone at the bookstore with a trash bucket and i dunked over j9. Notice my head size vs. his. heead! It's like an orange on a toothpick. J9 got to meet the pop culinary legend Rachel Ray. I could bet that half of my readers love rachel ray and half will hate her and the show. You can hate the shows, which can be awkward since she is essentially cooking and going to restuarants by herself and then talking out loud. I mean on $40 dollars a day take someone with ya would ya i feel bad. But anyway. After you meet her you see that's she's an amazing person and one you wouldn't mind hanging out with.

Posted by Patrick at 06:44 PM | Comments (2)

February 23, 2005

My singing career has been halted by living in HK!

Ok. My mom has always told me that i have a beautiful voice. Even wanted me to join the chorus in high school. Jeannine makes fun of me because i am really an awful singer when you turn off the radio that is singing backup. However, I am a masterful songwriter with such cb radio hits as "big sweater girl" and "slurpee". These climbed up the charts and you may be able to hear them covered by Mike. St. Laurence in a bar in new hampshire (he pays me 7cents a rendition). So I don't have the best voice, but ashlee simpson is doing it! Here's why I will never make it. I am too embarrassed to practice. Why you ask? I live in hells kitchen. The mecca of broadway singers and apartments with thin walls. My apartment building is filled with great saxophonists, opera singers and a lead in hairspray right next door. I hear them all day doing scales and warming up for their show. They also just sing while they are hanging out. Sometimes they sing conversations like they are living in an actual musical. What does thin walls have to do with my future singing career? Well, it's simple. I can't practice. The whole building will hear me. I am an avid shower singer, but i can no longer do that. Professional singers may hear me and think that i am going to be competing against them at their next audition. I don't want them to think i am a hack trying to make it. Plus, i like to make up songs and sing them so that wouldn't be appropriate either. So my singing career is on hold right now, plus i am too old for american idol. I will continue to write dope rhymes though. Here is some freestyle i did after watching 8 mile. It's getting me a lot of street credit.

i'm tolerant of a lot of things.. people, places, faces..
but' i'm not tolerant of a certain thing.... lactose...
i'm lactose intolerant..... sharkblog out.......

Posted by Patrick at 06:36 PM | Comments (2)

February 19, 2005

Take a walk in HK

I know my time in the HK is going to be limited. Here are some moments from a walk in the brisk kitchen today.

Posted by Patrick at 11:58 AM | Comments (1)

February 18, 2005

Bloomberg needs to crack down on bad pizza shops

New York has it all and to me one of the greatest things about nyc is the fact that you have the ability to stop anywhere in the city and pickup a slice of pizza that is better than any other slice anywhere in the good old u-s of a. Well that used to be the case. There was no risk. There is a major shift in new york city pizza. Fancy neopolitan pie shops are popping up everywhere trying to compete with the masters, like Grimaldis and Patsy's
Meanwhile, the manhattan pizza shops are no longer run as a family business. The kids headed for wall street and the pizza headed south, along with their parents who head to Boca. New York has the perfect environment for making pizza - the dough rises perfectly, lots of experts to learn from and of course the dirty water factor. The other day I went to a place that was by far the worse pizza ever served in nyc. Something needs to be done about this - pizza lovers unite, lawyers please sue. We need to keep the nyc pizza tradition alive. The place is called casa nova. I should have known by the name of the place. I asked them if they had any fresh slices and they said it's fresh when they heat it up (again!) I should have walked out but i felt trapped . I had to try it. The second worst pizza i've had recently is right outside my apartment. I soo wanted this place to be good that i have even tried it 10 times, waiting for it to be good. I was even in a denial phase since it would be awesome if the place was good. The cheese doesn't even melt on the pizza at pizza city. Our children and their children deserve the right to be able to go into any pizza place in nyc and enjoy a quick slice. We can not take a drago attitude and say if the pizza dies, it dies.

Posted by Patrick at 06:13 PM | Comments (1)

February 14, 2005

Saffron is not just an expensive spice for Paella

IT's like a huge orange under 2 toothpicks!

Dude - the 3rd gate does not count - DO OVER!!!

I'll take what is behind curtain number 27000!

Who needs the gates we have a MALL inside!

Port-o-John's enhanced the gates by passing additional wind!

Orange has some bite on this bark

Man, I can't even escape the gates in the bathroom

Here are some of my pics from the hyped up Gates. My review is simple. The Gates didn't suck! The most interesting part to me is the passion behind the project, the funding and actually pulling it off. It's a neat buzz that got me and a million others to the park in February. However, a masterpiece it is not, the park is already one in itself.

For pictures way better than mine, go to the best photo blog on the planet Rion.Nu or check out flickr

Posted by Patrick at 05:57 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

February 11, 2005

The GATES

Why I am so excited about this weekend? I am surely not an art buff, but the Gates is going to be an awesome experience. It is an art project 26 years in the making and solely funded by the artist. Read more about the passion of the artist in New York Magazine and check out other web sites on this big event. The buzz meter on this event in nyc is at all time high. I'm predicting this could be bigger than the launch of New Coke.

Christo's site on the gates

Blog dedicated to the gates

Posted by Patrick at 05:45 PM | Comments (1)

February 07, 2005

Super Boring

I haven't blogged in a while due to a trip north for some wedding planning and taking care of Jeannine. You can't exactly make blogging a priority when you have a sick fiance. Here are some random things from the past couple of days..

- how bad were the superbowl commercials? they were worse than watching the boring patriots win again. mc hammer, carson daly in a pepsi truck, talking animals and babies? - how pathetic. I can't remember one commercial so they did an awful job.

- Saw super size me the movie. Awesome and you probably will never go to mcdonalds for at least 1 road trip on the nys thruway. I give credit to anyone who can walk by a mcdonalds and not even think of the possibility of going in. I always fight it.

- wedding planning update
Things are going well with some interesting items along the way, such as a major drug bust at the hotel we blocked off rooms. Well needless to say we now aren't blocking off any rooms there. Photographer is booked and i am psyched he did work for the allman brothers. Jeannine has put a suggestion box for some of my ideas for review. Here are a few that didn't make it
- the random invite - send a random invite to someone in the phonebook selected at random and invite them to the wedding...

- On the train this weekend. a man was overheard talking to a family member about their proctocologist who was going to do a house call - no lie. He said. Well is he still going to be able tonight and check out my AS$? Just another reasons people should keep quiet on cell phones.

- how weird is the song don't let the sun go down on me by elton john - oh well. Hope all is well! happy monday everybody.

Posted by Patrick at 06:32 PM | Comments (1)

February 01, 2005

Let's start February with some musings

Ok everyone in blogland is saying that there blogs are full of musings. I did not get a perfect score on the verbal SAT and I sure is no grammar expert, but i think it's a lame stab at the word. If you look below a muse is either engaged in meditation or thougtfull sayings. I read a lot of blogs and rarely when you need to update everyday are you going to be deep in meditation or very thoughtful. Oh well - i've learned the meaning of the most overused word since the invention of blogs.

v. mused, mus·ing, mus·es
v. intr.
To be absorbed in one's thoughts; engage in meditation.
v. tr.
To consider or say thoughtfully: mused that it might take longer to drive than walk.
n.
A state of meditation.

The building on your left is my absolute dream NYC apartment, designed by Richard Meier. It's in the west village, open floor plan, nicole kiddman lives there and overlooks the hudson. I would do just about anything to one day be able to live here, but realize it's a pipe dream. What happens when your desire for a great bargain for NYC real estate becomes an obsession, read this awesome article from this months New York Magazine.

- I got a SPAM email today. I get a lot of these because someone signed me up for a mailing list for free movie tickets! Now each and every day I get tons of spam that can not be picked up by our spam removal program. I got a spam telling me to buy a tsunami bracelet to support the victims. In reading further, this is a complete scam and they are not a valid charity - they even try to give you a free dvd of the catastrophie for your home movie collection - sickos!. How could anyone in their right mind, do something like this? I guess the only thing suprising is that the email is from socially adequate canada.

- I love the NY POST. I especially love how it is a right winged paper in the craziest left wing city in the world. Even with this liberal nyc'ers pick this up as religiously as the right wing states go to bible school. During the election Bush was on the cover everyday with a go bush slogan. kerry supporters were buying it up just so they could see if king of all boneheads ben affleck was spotted in manhattan. I was suprised that they broke the front page article yesterday on Pataki hiring a maid on our dollar. Why am i not suprised? because they already know Pataki is completely done as governor and really have no chance at the governor election so they might as well bash him to say they are "fair and balanced".

- Hillary Clinton passed out during a speech yesterday and i had 2 questions - 1 is did you get that on film. That is usually hilarious, like the guy on the bachelorette a few weeks ago. and 2 was did she pass out after eating too many wings at the best place on earth for wings in buffalo, the anchor bar

- New Jersey Link of the day - What does Jersey Fresh mean according to the state?

Posted by Patrick at 06:38 PM | Comments (1)

January 30, 2005

What would Oprah Do?

I have 2 strange obsessions - new jersey and oprah. My pal over at b.michael.baker has started blogging and put up an educated post on medical insurers and oprah. What i find fascinating about Oprah is that there are only 2 type of people in the world - those who love oprah and those that have a love/hate relationship with oprah. If you truly can't stand her, you are just insane. She does way too much good for people through her love of charity and recognizing where she has come from. This goes far beyond her just giving for the sake of giving. What I can't take about oprah is exactly what B.michael.baker talks about; oprah lately is using her insane power over the consumer to push products down everyone's throat. Then she says she just does it to make peoples dreams come true. I don't mind when someone like don imus pushes a book he reads or even when trump tells us that burger king is good for us, but i don't like when someone is pushing a car that they would never drive and saying it's a dream come true.. you get a pontiac.. you get a pontiac...

Posted by Patrick at 10:14 PM | Comments (0)

January 26, 2005

WIN A PRIZE!!!

As you may or may not know I have been in the shirtblog labs studying the t-shirt business. I've been trying to master the craft testing screen printing and heat transfers. I'm almost there and ready for business. The silly part is i'm trying to be a one stop shop, design, production, marketing, and technology with a little help from J9. Hopefully, when i start the 5 shark readers will buy. So here's the deal.

All this stuff is hard, the wedding, work, shark blog - i've hit a roadblock. I'm looking for your ideas for t-shirts. If I like it and use it - I send you a free t-shirt any size - it's that sample. No forms to fill out, no rules that exempt family and friends since that would exclude my readers and no strings attached - essentially i take your idea and take it to the promise land while you see me on QVC pushing your idea.

JU8T TYPE YOUR IDEAS IN THE COMMENTS OR IF YOU ARE A SHARKBLOG VOYEUR SEND ME AN EMAIL Try to keep it clean!

The shirt to your left is our first winner and he doesn't even know it. All it took was one email. Baby Bruce will be sporting this shirt at central park catching all the ladies eyes from the comfort of his stroller.

Posted by Patrick at 10:13 PM | Comments (2)

January 25, 2005

Sharky Awards versus the Oscars

Every day I wander through some blogs and When I surfed over to Gothamist, I was kinda shocked. On the front page they actually blogged about something as opposed to just linking up to the ny post. Good blogging there is usually found in the sections and interviews. But after I read their article on the oscar nominees, I realized why they don't. The claim is that Paul Giamatti was snubbed because he is ugly, calls Scorsese a snooz and didn't even mention Million Dollar Baby - which is in an early lead for the more prestigious movie of the year sharky. Sideways is an enjoyable film, funny and the wings guy nails that role. However, it does not deliver an oscar winning knockout, like clint eastwood and Hillary swank. My buddy Barry is right on with sideways - there is no way Paul Giamatti's character lands that babe in the end. Sorry for ruining it. She's georgeous and he is a going nowhere fast writer with a major drinking problem, minus self esteem and plus baggage.

Scorsese is one of the great american directors and will probably win best director based on the fact this movie is his best without the violence or controversy. He deserves it for goodfellas and mean streets, raging bull and taxi driver aren't bad. I have yet to see the other nominees Ray, Finding Neverland and the aviator yet so i can't make official predictions.

A few Plugs

Last night Jeannine and I checked out Chipperton vocal-tainers Shooby dooby dooby hour at Upright Citizen's Brigade. Hilarious. There is no better way to waste that much time by laughing. I still am giving this place a major plug and they sell PBR.

Also, last week checked out a great band - Brothers of industry. They play at kenny's castaways on Saturdays. Bar sucks but the band rocks. Get some free music for your ipod.

#comments

Posted by Patrick at 06:14 PM | Comments (1)

January 14, 2005

Today is a great day!

Today is a wonderful wonderful day! I'm getting a lot of requests to post some news today with details, details but you will have to wait a little bit longer. If you don't have any idea of what's going on - send me an email or call me and i'll fill you in!

Posted by Patrick at 04:36 PM

January 12, 2005

Guest Blogger Rant

Today we have a guest blog on what seems to be this week's subject; parking in Manhattan. One of the smartest liberals I know is Barry and i've been trying to get him to blog. He's smart and actually reads the new york times, while i just carry it to look smart. Here is something he sent me below and will be my guest serious political blogger consultant news guy.

What's great about the subject below is that is right in front of where i used to live on the upper east side and my dad got a ticket for parking there. A $100 ticket is a great way to liven your dad's spirit on mother's day! I'd really like to have this thing get towed to 38th and 12th AKA hell and see how long it takes to process this one!!!!

Barry's Gripe
Construction is perpetual in Manhattan. It is annoying but it is also necessary - progress is good. I understand that building/property owners make trade-offs based on what is sometimes called the "Quality Triangle", which states that between fast, cheap, and good, you can only achieve two of them - choose wisely. What really gets to me is when these people disregard the law, which you may have noticed is not an OPTION on the quality triangle. Want an example? This picture, taken at East 87th Street, between 2nd and 3rd in Manhattan, shows a construction trailer parked within 15 feet of a fire hydrant (s. 4-08(e)(2): the 15 feet law in NYC). This trailer has been there for over a month, and will probably remain there for at least a year. At this point, I don't care if the people get a damn ticket. I want the trailer moved to comply with the law, since I think the law was created to ensure public safety in the case of a fire. I know the head sharkblogger's dad would want to see these guys get a ticket since he did for doing the samething

Posted by Patrick at 12:24 PM | Comments (0)

January 11, 2005

A day in the life in NYC - Tourist Towing Victim or moron?

This is the true story of a an actual Manhattan towing violation from beginning to end - no details left untold. Are my friends, the Well's victim to a tourist towing scam by the nypd towing unit or did they make a rookie mistake? You decide. However, I was there every step of the way and i bring it to you the readers of shark blog! Here goes:

Background: Chris and Donna Wells are great friends and stopped in friday night for some dinner and drinks with Jeannine and friends before they head out to LI for a family party.

Friday, January 7th, 7:30PM: Wells calls from the car giving me the ETA on arrival and telling us not to wait for our dinner reservations . I tell him don't worry about it 8pm reservations means 9pm in nyc. He asks where to park. I say go by 11th ave in the 40s and look for a lot. Street parking is almost non existent in HK due to times square.

8PM - They arrive and Chris gives me no details on where he parks except that one of the lots was full. We quickly proceed to dinner.

8:30PM-10pm - We get some great drinks and chow at Momma Mexico. Donna even gets to experience a b-list star sighting of Bob the Bacheolor. Everyone is AOK!

10pm-3am - We hit several bars on the upper west side. I don't know the upper west side, but did manage to find a good dive called yogies by the beacon theatre. I lied and said blue sky by the allmans' was written there during one of their month long stints at the beacon. Next we hit other "so called" upper west side dive bars. What gives them the right to call some of these dive bars. Dive 75 is a dive bar? more like yuppie hell to me. We hit the original brother jimmies and another irish bar where there was a stalker eyeing the ladies.

3am - Chris and I go out for what else, 3 bags of chips. At this point I am in no position to make a judgement call. Chris asks if his car is ok in the parking spot. We check the sign, check the other cars and then purchase cheez doodles!

Saturday, 8th 10am - Chris goes to check car - not there and proceeds to blaim me for the judgement call i barely remember the night before. That won't hold up in court.

We first check to see the area and why we were towed? Here is the sign.

The sign states no standing m-f 8am-6pm - no violation
Chris was parked in front of the cement and orange cone? is that cone official or from a construction site?

They were doing no construction on the building that day.
Throughout the day on saturday many cars were parked in front of the orange cone with no tickets
Chris has a massachusetts license plate - ding ding ding!

Saturday 12pm - We locate the vehicle and head over to 38th and 12th or hell - semantics. When we walked over we thought he'd just get screwed and walk up and pay and get his vehicle! Here's Chris trotting in the building with a no care attitude.

but we were wrong - dead wrong. We waited in line with about 30 others and a lady took our info. Everyone sat there from 12:30 to 1:45 with no movement. THE cashier was on her break so the process stood still. This is what this hole looked like.

The best part is that everyone was from out of town. They shared war stories of being 15 minutes over the meter and being towed. One guy's wife told us that she told him not to park in the no standing zone, but he told her that wasn't for cars it was for the hookers!! One girl, travelling with 3 loser guys from philly, even exploded when her friends went outside on how out of all the restaurants in manhattan her friends picked quiznos. When you pay, you move to the next security guard who escorts you to your vehicle via a golf cart. Finally, after a license plate messup by the cashier we got out of hell at 2:45, almost 3 hours!

I must say I really enjoyed this experience and laughed along the way. Everyone who gets towed is really pretty friendly these days. No one blew a gasket and everyone will be back to nyc - hopefully they will park in a lot or try mass transit. In the end the damage is about $235 bucks. So you could have parked in a lot for 20 bucks and used the money to stay at the ritz as opposed to my shoebox studio. Victim or moron - i have no idea - i just enjoyed the ride!

Posted by Patrick at 05:28 PM | Comments (5)

January 07, 2005

Tivo sucks because I have to be subjected to this!!

This advertising monstrosity is popping up all over the west side of Manhattan. I had to get a snapshot of it! I was thinking of going to Ft. Lauderdale this weekend, but after the manequin lifeguard and lady in a jail looking sun room manger, i'm freaking going! I wonder if Panama city will compete with Fort Lauderdale by driving a spring break version with those naked manequins that freak you out at the stores. Is this the new phase of advertising? If my job was to drive this thing, i'd drive this thing off the brooklyn bridge and then kick my own ass!

Posted by Patrick at 06:06 PM | Comments (0)

Land Shark is huge in Denmark

One of my favorite movie lines of all time is the "We're huge in Belgium" line from Singles. Citizen Dick Rules!. When checking my web traffic, I found that I am getting the largest amount of foreign hits from Denmark. To the danes I say - "hvad er der i vejen mig dansk broder og afdelingssygeplejersken" or what's up my danish brothers and sisters - thanks for the support (or the spam)

- I think the comments make blogs the best - don't be shy - you don't have to be witty or smart, it's not an evite. Just don't do it while your drunk and use curse words (lynch!) - cause I can take away your freedom of comment.

- Vote for your favorite blog at the 2005 bloggie awards

- fashizzle sharkizzle your favorite site at asksnoop.com

- Post a comment at PeteTschudy.com and win a thong!!

- Check out woot.com they sell 1 item a day at a low low price and that's it. Pretty cool business idea.

Posted by Patrick at 12:01 PM | Comments (3)

January 05, 2005

Thanks Santa

I've had a long battle with digital cameras. I bought a really good Pentax, but it was so small it broke in my pocket after a week. Plus their warranty didn't cover fat guy in small pants with a camera in his pocket. Well I just tested my new camera yesterday and here are a few shots from it around my neighborhood. Not too bad..

Posted by Patrick at 05:12 PM | Comments (0)

January 03, 2005

New Years tie gets retired

Happy New year everybody! On December 31st 2004, I retired my RED party new years tie. The ceremony was observed by a small group of people, Jeannine and I. This year, for the first time in 10+ years, I turned down those tempting offers for 100+ dollars and all you can drink until you get a 4 day hangover! It was a good run there, but all good things come to an end. Not to say i won't attend a party, but you won't catching me making trips to vacation lands, such as syracuse. One friend always claimed new years is amatuer night and i am starting to agree. Oremus called on thursday to wish a happy new year and review some of the highlights over the past ten years, including..
- the greatest new years ever in the hamptons where our college friends refused to take no for an answer and actually came to my house and stole pizza right out my dad's hands.
- At Dudley's when i couldn't find a place to sleep after staying up late, using the cardboard from the 6 foot sub as a resting place..
- The party i decided to throw at my parents house where friends decided to play beiruit in my laundry room, drank every bit of alcohol (including vintage 70's creme de mint) and 2 6-foot 300 pounders tried to square off next to my mom's hummels! ahh memories....
- the 12 hour drive back from boston after new years 2002..

Please fell free to share some more new years memories.. it was a good run...

Posted by Patrick at 12:13 PM | Comments (0)

December 13, 2004

The Milford Plaza changes it's name!!!

I was shocked as I walked by the Milford Plaza Hotel, AKA the lullaby of broadway, and saw it's new name! If you grew up around New York, you grew up with the Milford Plaza commercial jingle in your head all day and all night. It was forced upon you while your parents watched channel 2 news. It was actually a quite catchy tune. Recently, business isn't so good since the explosive growth of the boutique hotel, like the W. In a last ditch effort to save their marketshare they have renamed the hotel to milf plaza. The new ad campaign features, Jason Biggs singing in the style of one of his off broadway shows. Good Luck with the new business model. Word on the street is that teens are flocking here.

Posted by Patrick at 09:27 PM | Comments (0)

December 12, 2004

Christmas In NYC - Heaven and Hell

Christmas in nyc is both the best and worse time of year. It's as if the whole city is jacked up on uppers and downers. What's good about nyc is the spirit of the season, the decorations, the shopping, and partying tips the scales. However, with that comes TOURISTS. As a new yorker you really just need to relax and enjoy the good that comes with the season. Those who get aggravated at the tourists and sigh with disgust are morans. I particularly like when tourists on 5th avenue, fresh from getting ripped off, ignore those don't walk signs as they cross the street. What's even funier is when they try to follow real new yorkers as they find a quick opportunity to cross during the don't walk sign! They follow and then run madly after a cabbie honks and speeds up at them. Slow down don't get too excited to get to Rockefeller Center to do a triple sow cow in an overcrowded skating rink. Don't rush to the Olive Garden in times square, it's the same Olive Garden that is in your hometown just more expensive! Pay attention tourists because people get hit all the time. It's a fact and you can ask Jeannine who sees it all too often in the ICU!! Happy Holidays!

Posted by Patrick at 07:22 PM | Comments (1)

December 11, 2004

When do you say when on the $2 umbrella?

The sharkblog.com laboratory is at it again testing those umbrella's that amazingly show up on the streets when it starts to rain in Manhattan. I despise umbrellas, especially since I grew up never using one, running from the car to a building. If I was the NYC mayor, I would ban them. If I had a donut for each time i've been hit by some idiot not paying attention with their umbrella, i'd be really really fat. When I do buy umbrella's I only get the street ones and it is only when there is an actual monsoon. I'm not going to be that guy with the golf umbrella or the burberry umbrella, PLEASE spare me! If it is a slight down pour, I just buy the post for 25 cents and use that. A little tip; when you do buy those umbrellas you never take the initial price. $4 is highway robbery and 50 cents is what they paid for it, so i only pay 2.
So How long does the $2 umbrella last?
The $2 umbrella lasts exactly 2 months before it becomes a deadly weapon. Although, I'm still using this one in the picture to the left, I am about to retire it. If you look close there are 2 very long umbrella daggers, sharper than a swiss army. I am really suprised you can't be ticketed for these shotty umbrella's - you could literally poke someone's eye out. Oh well so long umbrella - I got my 2 dollars worth, thanks for slicing my finger when I tried to collapse you and thanks for kinda keeping me dry!

Posted by Patrick at 05:45 PM | Comments (0)

November 30, 2004

We all could use this

The europeans are up to being techno savvy again with their cell phones. They now have a cell phone service that you can prevent yourself from drunk dialing. I wish they had this on the rotary phone i used during college. It's not only fun to give a drunk dial but it's a greater feeling to know that someone cares enough to call at 3:00 am! These stats are astonishing.
"A recent survey by the company of more than 400 people found that 95 percent made phone calls after a drinking session, with 30 percent of calls going to exes and 19 percent to current partners."

Posted by Patrick at 11:16 PM | Comments (0)

November 24, 2004

My 24 hour NYC Tour

I spent Sunday and Monday entertaining Tildy and Judy. Both have never really been to the city and aren't interested in museums. Here's what I came up with. Tell me what you think.
- Picked them up at Port Authority went to time square, walked fast throught there showing the inside of espn sportszone and then avoided $12 beers. Walked to Bryant park and the public library
- Hopped on the b and got off at grand street right in the heart of chinatown. A great place to understand the different cultures of the city. Walked towards canal and then to city hall, brooklyn bridge, and a glimpse of ground zero.
- We swung down to wall street and then for our first break we hit Ulysses, a great irish bar, on pearl street. Which is probably the most historic street in NYC.
- Next we took the 1,9 up to Rockefeller center caught the tree, the madness and st. Patrick's Cathederal. Walked back through times square to hell's kitchen.
- At night we took the e down to Jeannine's and hit the corner bistro. A nyc staple and must visit regardless of being a tourist, a villager or a Burger king employee. yum deep fried bacon. Tildy asked for a side salad and they brought him a grilled cheese!
- Next morning I let them venture off to the empire state building by themselves. 2 hours not bad.
- Met for lunch at 57th and 5th. Hit a nyc deli and a bathroom stop at the trump tower, which is not really a tourist attraction, but one of the best bathroom stops in the city.
- Hit the park including the rink, boathouse, up to the upper east side. Walked back to my apartment and hit the intrepid....whew

We did all of this from 2pm on Sunday to 2pm on Monday. That's my 24 hour nyc tour. You add a few more hours i add a street cart, battery park, and a few of my favorite watering holes.
Just some thoughts on the early feedback on the blog. I have been sending out to friends and they are already complaining about the update frequency. I've been called a stickeater, told that i've already jumped the shark, and that instead of shark blog i should have named it sh!T blog. It's already huge in Tokyo. Thanks for all your support and Happy Thanksgiving from Sharkblog!

Posted by Patrick at 12:24 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

November 20, 2004

Inflation hits the Irishman!

I like everyone have been noticing that prices are on the rise for a lot of goods, while others are simply having you pay the same for less. Snickers has been cutting down the size of the candy bar and say they did it because we are all too fat. Yogurt, Potato chips, Snapple all followed suit, but recently they've gone too far. It has hit one of my favorite past times..Sharing a pint of Guinness with friends! Certain Irish bars in NYC have begun to roll out smaller pint glasses, blaming it on the beer distributors for rising keg prices. Do they understand the ramifications here? I recently challenged a bar tender at THE GAF in hell's kitchen and he told me he'd rather do this than charge $6 a beer and then asked me for $5.75. Instead of losing sleep over this, i borrowed one of these glasses to get the real truth. I brought it home to the sharkblog laboratory and concluded that when you buy a Guiness in these lame inflation hiding Irish bars you only get 9 Ounces of the nectar of Dublin! To put this in perspective an actual real Guinness Pint glass to the brim is 18 ounces! (subtract a little for the guiness head and you get a pint) See for yourself below. Well what do you do? I say tell your bartender with the irish brogue that you won't stand for it and then buy a coors light. Or go to the best irish bars that don't participate in this nonsense, such as the Thaddy Cons, puck fair and dublin6.

Posted by Patrick at 11:55 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

November 18, 2004

Take the $10 a day NYC challenge!!!

Zach Braff when he did the talk show rounds for Garden State, told everyone during his starving actor days in NYC he would try to eat out meals on a $10 a day budget. He stated his daily diet included a lot of pizza and falafel. Me being cheap and up for a challenge, decided to give it a try. Rachel Ray thinks she is all bad and does NYC for $40 dollars a day! Anyone can do that. I dare you to try this in your town. For those of you in upstate new york, the game is called $3 per day. So here goes:

The Rules:
- $10 for 3 meals in NYC
- You can't cook any of them
- Only one meal can be pizza or hot dogs
- Tap Water is cool by me
- No street vendors (Not that I don't love the dirty water dog)
- You won't be tipping on this day
- None of the places you can go can be rated by zagat!

Challenge: Complete the $10 challenge in Hell's Kitchen

Breakfast: Studio Coffee shop - 9th ave between 44th and 45th.
You can get 2 eggs any style home fries and bacon for $3.80. If you avoid the bacon at $2.30 you can leave the best waitress ever, virginia, a tip! Everyone there wiill welcome you with either a hug or call you love.

Lunch: NYC DELI - 10th ave corner of 46th
My boys around the corner have the best sandwich deal. A full boarshead (the package says so anyway)sub any meat and a can of soda for $3.95. They even have TAB and sodas not in english. Sometimes they actually even get your order right!

Dinner: 99 cents pizza shop - 9th ave at 41st
I only have $2.25 left. I could settle for a slice from any place in hell's kitchen or I could venture to the area surrounding port authority. ooh tough call. I love choice and I had 2! I could either get 2 hearty slices or 2 hot dogs and a soda for $2.25.

HK Conquered! I'll be coming to your neighborhood soon. Next challenge: Greenwich Village where my girl lives. Stay tuned.

Posted by Patrick at 01:29 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

November 17, 2004

Now is this appropriate?

In the wake of all that is going on with being PC and a morally cognizant society. Add the recent incidents, Janet Jackson superbowl debacle, Monday night football desperate housewives and the recent NYC bus lines ads. Is this add in hell's kitchen from FUSE appropriate? It uses A.S.S as the abbreviation for after school special. What a creative play on on the original after school special that scared me away from chewing tobacco. What's next are advertisers going to target 3 year olds with the word poopyhead?

Posted by Patrick at 11:16 PM | Comments (0)

November 13, 2004

Let the blogging begin.....

This is the start of a nerdy new journey that i've been talking up for a while.. So I am finally sitting down and putting the time in. I am committing to keep up with it as much as possible..Hope you all enjoy!

Jeannine asked me why sharkblog since i am not a marine biologist and went fishing once in south jersey.. Well i say WHY NOT sharkblog...plus i love the Landshark skit from saturday night live and Shark Sandwich from Spinal Tap.

Posted by Patrick at 04:23 AM | Comments (3)