April 20, 2006

Jersey Doesn't Smoke! This state has momentum

Jersey obsessed I still am. Shore season is right around the corner and you know what that means! yes, a tri-state area commercial with John Corzine walking the beach with a Bon Jovi song in the background. Yes, It's true. Bon Jovi and Bruce always step up to the plate for the good old nj. This year Jersey has a new slogan Jersey, come see for yourself. Wow Brilliant. I've always said there is a PR makeover needed but in the end I think you love nj or you loathe it. The best ideas for the slogan contest they had were posted on this weird nj forum. Everything is looking up for the good old nj. They banned smoking and can you believe that not one smoker stopped drinking at bars? A jersey resident just put a nickel in a slot machine in AC and won 10 Million Bucks! Soprano's are back! The devils pull off a miracle to win the division. The nets are winning and still nobody cares, except the campbells soup nets band. Best of all Clifton, new jersey is home of the hottest new yoga studio in the entire country, Yoga Centric. If you know Delana, you know she is the one that made yoga cool, and is bringing it to the people not those ny yuppie types. Go to the web site and find the pictures of Mike, they are classic.

Ok I can't resist. This pic needs to have a quote contest. I'll start.

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"Would Someone please give me a high five"

Posted by Patrick at 07:20 PM | Comments (3)

July 05, 2005

Today in NJ

njpride.jpg As you know I am a mere outsider looking in from out my window to Jersey. Not exactly out my window but close enough. I did my weekly scan of NJ news on google and what was at the top. Acting Governor Codey vs Tom Cruise. Codey states "Tom Cruise knows as much about postpartum depression as I do about acting, and he should stick to acting and not talk about women who need help," I completely agree, however, why bother giving Tom Cruise the time of day? I hate that I am even writing about this. Also, we all know the "shut up and act" and use your fame for something positive tip. Cruise learned about psychiatry through scientology, these are the same folks that hook people up to a stress test machine in times square that they purchase from the dollar store. NJ, keep this silly stuff out of the headlines! On a positive note, if you love wildwood like I do, Please check your local PBS listing for Wildwood Days. It is a great docuementary on wildwood and an effort to preserve the "doo wop" style motels by the shore. Many famous south jersey and philly residents chime in and share their love of "the watch the tram car please" lady and the newspaper guys on the beach yelling "i've got the Phil-A-delphia Daily news, I have people, i have..."

Posted by Patrick at 07:26 PM | Comments (0)

June 06, 2005

Jersey Doesn't Suck - Part 2 "Extreme PR Makeover Needed"

jerseydoesntsuckyellowicon copy.jpgI have been attempting to put together my Jersey manifesto, but time has not been on my side. So i am now going to make it a blog series. I came up with this saying after a need for outside support for jersey. Many think I am from jersey and ask "what exit?". I am actually from upstate NY, near lovely POTOWN. I am leading a grass roots movement of outsiders supporting jersey. jersey sucks is everywhere! Lame-o Jay Leno ranks on the state in monologues, blogs rant about their road trip when they got stuck in traffic in jersey. I am trying to get it to jersey doesn't suck and then the monumental movement to Jersey rocks. For the lifelong jersey resident, i know you get mad that jersey doesn't suck assumes that there is a fair amount of suckiness related to jersey. If you have lived there all your life, you already know it doesn't suck, so chill and i'll send you a t-shirt and help the cause. Just a note, this strange obsession is not just me. My family have been pro-jersey all my life, spending 2+ weeks every year camping in the 25 foot Prowler pulled by a bright yellow former school bus chevy suburban to beachcomber resort in cape may. My sister is coming all the way from Colorado this summer, with friends to hit the jersey shore, eventhough cali is closer.

To start this movement, we really need to understand why some people don't like jersey. People always point to the obvious ones, the smell of the chemical plants, areas directly off the turnpikes, drivers, traffic, the first view when you take nj transit across the river, and of course the old "it's not new york". But i took it a little deeper. Over the past few months I have been simply going to google news and searching "new jersey". Here are a few of the entries I have found and really point to my first recommendation - jersey needs a pr makeover. The first thing they can do is work with google to get new jersey nets off as the top new search.. come on.

1) 80 year old New Jersey Madam arrested! - What? That's sick. Jersey is pro-business, but how come this article made it all the way to the BBC!

2) New Jersey has the purest heroin for the 2nd year in a row! - I read this when I walked by Fox news studios in NYC. Come on this shouldn't hit the ticker. I had to search hard to find that jersey schools are some of the best schools in the nation!

3) Jersey resident guilty of shooting his laser pointer at a plane! Every article associates this guy with jersey. A good pr person could hopefully change jersey resident to "Freaking Moron".

4) Billboards from jersey residents "Welcome to New Jersey: A horrible place to do business." as you go to the Deleware memorial bridge. It has been placed by someone who was rejected for a home depot in jersey due to wetlands. a pr campaign should come to him from the IRS. Jersey is the pro-est of all pro business states. It's overdeveloped to the max and has to draw the line somewhere. However, another win for the jersey haters as they pass through on the turnpike!

Nj makes mistake after mistake in this area, except being pro sopranos. It can't win recently with governor issues. temporary Governor Codey and his wife decided to bring her story of depression forward, however, they brought it forward on the weekend edition of NBC ny4 with an awful report.It was awkward and didn't really get the message across. There had to be a better way and it ended up getting made fun of on the radio and causing yet another bad portrayal of jersey, when Codey challenged the shock jock to put up his dukes like 30's style boxing. get your act together and start promoting some of the awesome things about jersey! things i will speak of in volume 2. keep rocking jersey.. i'll probably be living there soon and will miss your shores this summer as i save for a wedding.. pork rolls rule...

Posted by Patrick at 06:25 PM | Comments (2)

March 29, 2005

I smell Beach House SEASON!!

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I have a special entry from some of my x-shore house buddies from the summer of 2003. They sent me an email asking to join a new house so i asked one to blog. My boy Jersey Joe took me up on it so here goes...

aahh yeah... you feeling this spring thing today or what. well you know i can smell summer yo. MY house on the ramapo river is underwater but something is making me feel good. i knew i should live in brick township closer to da shore. My pops got me a gig in the key grip union but sopranos isn't shooting for another year. you know what no worries! Why? summer is right around the corner..bada bing. when that gig does pick up though i am getting my own tanning bed yo.if i gots to Live out of my car this summer it's on.. my boy jc already got me a little work running a taylor ham delivery truck up and down the shore this summer. yo i already told him i aint delivering on friday or monday - that's not even debatable caus i'm going to the tiki bar on sunday . yo my sunday is like most dweebs njguido2.jpgfriday night. hey i'm only 35 man i got my whole life ahead of me. the baseball roids scare isn't goint to stop me either caus i fill this tank top naturally. I got 7 no 8 new shirts this season - i picked up a mad dope one in philly this past weekend. It's silk with a fly design - fit's like a glove. If i run out of shirts this summer i can always borrow my boys. . i freaking love myself. I'm gonna shine up the mustang this weekend. i'll be at jenks in april yo. If your a sell out i'll see you pulling up in your jeta in sea bright, manesquan or lbi not me man i keep it real belmar baby. my boys and i got a place right next to these girls we met at djs last year .shore houses are mad crazy expensive this ed.jpgyear due to the discovery of how buff jersey guys are.. my mom asked me to slow down NEVER -not until i meet my dream girl. I hit all the hot clubs from philly to NYC this winter and I'm bored man.. yo yo.. club mix 2005 will be hotter than ever.. last year i went to fist and cuffs at the pizza shop after someone told me there's no ham in a calzone.. there's always ham in it.. i hope my girlfriend for the summer doesn't steal my zoloft. I need that shizie. This year i'm drinking michelob ultra, last year corona hit my 6 pack. i am so psyched right now i'm going to get a new cooler for the beach house this weekend. no F that i'm getting tiki torches. i know i'll get bored half way through like the last 13 years but when i do i just put a few logs on the fire with a road trip - ocean city and stop and pick up philly girls in wildwood... last year i used gel yo it didn't give me the hold and i didn't get enough ladies so ths year i'm going with wax. no f that highlights with my new spike. njguido3.jpgmy tan is already booming yo. Gonna meet me a staten island girl and remove her ties to the verezano. i heard they are trying to ban teens from tanning salons in jersey- i have to get to our capitol, trenton and stop that. yo players see you at seaside memorial day for the kickoff party. YEAH BOY. 50 extra freaking curls tonight at GOLDS.. sell outs need not apply go to da hamptons sucker.
Joey OUT....

pictures from everyone's favorite jersey site.. njguido.com

Posted by Patrick at 09:20 PM | Comments (0)

December 09, 2004

New Jersey Doesn't Suck

njdoesnotsuck.jpg I've been out of pocket on business this week. And since some people say I'm always negative on my blog, I want to offer some positive words after my business trip this week - New Jersey is not that bad. People rant about hating jersey , while crazy NJ born have a sense of pride lamer than Red Sox fans. I really have to say that I am a big NJ supporter. I spent time in Princeton this week and I must say everyone was pleasant. I also enjoyed going from 80 miles an hour to 10 in order to take a right to make a lefthand u-turn! Jersey is a story in itself, the beaches, the guidos, the hair, bon jovi, the Governor, and of course BRUCE. My mom swears that the jersey shore has the best beaches on earth, and she even has been to beaches in florida and california to compare! I welcome trips to the NJ, even if I have to go through the swamps to get to the good spots. I hope that is positive enough for you.

Posted by Patrick at 11:23 PM | Comments (2)