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May 12, 2005
If I was hiring a spokesperson, I would hire.......
I love when product advertising and infomercials feature b list celebrities. Why? Because of the positive impact they have - you never forget them. Hello suzanne sommers is a gazillionaire, hasselhof could sell ice to the eskimos. I'm not talking about some of the stupid reality tv stars or the likes of butufuco. I'm talking former acting genius's like Eric Estrada. I am sold on hot springs village and my down payment is already in the hands of ponch. If sharkblog was around during the dot com boom and i had zero revenue streams and zero room for growth, but had tons of venture capitalist telling me to advertise, i'd go with the following b-list celebrities for my super bowl commercial. What the heck, maybee i can still get them and promote the sharkblog brand. maybee i'll approach them with a script based on their highest moments in their acting careers. Here are the three i would pick for my 3 commercials or print ads.
I would get the Danny Noonan for my ads and make him do a play on caddyshack with a red hat, shirt, carry rodney's golf bag. You read Sharkblog Danny? EVERYDAY!!
2) Either Rob Garrison or William Zabka
Rob Garrison played Tommy in Karate Kid and yelled the 2nd best line in a move ever - "put him in a body bag Johnny" He was also 2nd best in the Cobra Kai karate club. Tommy you are number 1 at sharkblog and my first choice. If Rob's not available then i'd go for johnny himself, William zabka. If zabka doesn't look like johhny then i get bart conner from another great hit RAD!!! movie of the year in 1986.
If the investors were really willing to put up the bucks. I'd go and pull dolph lundgren off the set of his latest sci fi tech showtime late night thriller cyborg alien pimp. You all know the line, especially if you hang out with me. it's a great line. if People ask you "hey where did dave go? and then say..if he die, he dies in a russian accent.. friends really get a kick out of it. It's a rocky 4 thing and one day i will prove my theory that there is a rocky movie on at all times somewhere in the world. Dolph would say to the competitors.. if the ##insert sharkblog competitor here## dies, they die...
Who would your spokesperson be for your madeup business?
Posted by Patrick at May 12, 2005 05:33 PM
Comments
Mine would definitely be Rainier Wolfcastle:
"Here's the scooop, your Hagan-days are OVA."
Posted by: B at May 13, 2005 08:43 AM
You could use Judd Nelson from the breakfast club, if you don't read sharkblog you're a "neo maxied zoomed dwebee" of Who reads sharkblog, "beside numerous women in the niagra falls area". He may be too big of a star for your budget, but he probably needs the work.
The same with Bill Paxton in Wierd Science, if you don't read sharkblog "You're Stewed but wad." I'm sure the sharkblog budget can at least pay bill more than he got for broken lizard's Club Dread.
I can't believe you know the name of the kid form RAD, Cru Jones in the movie of Course. I only remember the girl from fullhouse teaching Cru how to "airwalk", Which of course he did to win the helltrack race.
I'm also pretty sure the "Donger" is looking for work these days, he wouldn't even have to say anything. Also if "get him a body bag" is the 2nd best line from Karate kid, What is the first. And if you need a theme song "You're the best Around" from Karate kid is one of my personal favorites.
Posted by: jaygags at May 14, 2005 09:43 PM
Two words... Cory Cory!...just because you could.
Or
If you are looking for bulk, you can probably get the whole cast of "Surreal Life" for a decent price.
Posted by: Ed Winstanley at May 16, 2005 04:57 PM
what about the "need the dues" guy from animal house!! jay good call on rad. donger is too "out there" on vh1
Posted by: patrick at May 19, 2005 06:24 PM