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March 29, 2005
I smell Beach House SEASON!!
I have a special entry from some of my x-shore house buddies from the summer of 2003. They sent me an email asking to join a new house so i asked one to blog. My boy Jersey Joe took me up on it so here goes...
aahh yeah... you feeling this spring thing today or what. well you know i can smell summer yo. MY house on the ramapo river is underwater but something is making me feel good. i knew i should live in brick township closer to da shore. My pops got me a gig in the key grip union but sopranos isn't shooting for another year. you know what no worries! Why? summer is right around the corner..bada bing. when that gig does pick up though i am getting my own tanning bed yo.if i gots to Live out of my car this summer it's on.. my boy jc already got me a little work running a taylor ham delivery truck up and down the shore this summer. yo i already told him i aint delivering on friday or monday - that's not even debatable caus i'm going to the tiki bar on sunday . yo my sunday is like most dweebs 
friday night. hey i'm only 35 man i got my whole life ahead of me. the baseball roids scare isn't goint to stop me either caus i fill this tank top naturally. I got 7 no 8 new shirts this season - i picked up a mad dope one in philly this past weekend. It's silk with a fly design - fit's like a glove. If i run out of shirts this summer i can always borrow my boys. . i freaking love myself. I'm gonna shine up the mustang this weekend. i'll be at jenks in april yo. If your a sell out i'll see you pulling up in your jeta in sea bright, manesquan or lbi not me man i keep it real belmar baby. my boys and i got a place right next to these girls we met at djs last year .shore houses are mad crazy expensive this 
year due to the discovery of how buff jersey guys are.. my mom asked me to slow down NEVER -not until i meet my dream girl. I hit all the hot clubs from philly to NYC this winter and I'm bored man.. yo yo.. club mix 2005 will be hotter than ever.. last year i went to fist and cuffs at the pizza shop after someone told me there's no ham in a calzone.. there's always ham in it.. i hope my girlfriend for the summer doesn't steal my zoloft. I need that shizie. This year i'm drinking michelob ultra, last year corona hit my 6 pack. i am so psyched right now i'm going to get a new cooler for the beach house this weekend. no F that i'm getting tiki torches. i know i'll get bored half way through like the last 13 years but when i do i just put a few logs on the fire with a road trip - ocean city and stop and pick up philly girls in wildwood... last year i used gel yo it didn't give me the hold and i didn't get enough ladies so ths year i'm going with wax. no f that highlights with my new spike. 
my tan is already booming yo. Gonna meet me a staten island girl and remove her ties to the verezano. i heard they are trying to ban teens from tanning salons in jersey- i have to get to our capitol, trenton and stop that. yo players see you at seaside memorial day for the kickoff party. YEAH BOY. 50 extra freaking curls tonight at GOLDS.. sell outs need not apply go to da hamptons sucker.
Joey OUT....
pictures from everyone's favorite jersey site.. njguido.com
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March 23, 2005
Back in CALI-FORNIA
Sorry for the no blog activity, but I am back in CALI. This time in LA. For the first time I drove on the 405 and must say wow I wish I was in the oil business. I've never seen so many cars and smog in my life. They talk about the traffic all the time but it is no joke. What's funny is that when I am on the west coast i have no blog inspiration.. oohh traffic in la, never heard that one before... ooh a play on the OC theme song and LL Cool J... I guess that makes NYC the place for me and I really miss everything about it. Sure it's not sunny and laid back but it's home and I can't wait to get back.
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March 16, 2005
The dog days of graffiti
From the same brilliant people that brought us "Please Curb your Dog", are the recent "Keep your dog away from my overpriced specialty shop" sidewalk stencils. When I did some research, I found out that Forty seven tons of dog poop is deposited on the sidewalks and streets of New York every day. Half of that does not get picked up by the dog owners. Hey I'm not one to argue here that dog's don't make sense in the city, but it's a fact of life here and as a business owner you need to deal with it. You know I didn't ask you to put out a flower pot for me to trip over after a few beers.
Half of you don't even put anything in the flower pot. Also, if you are going to do some stencil graffiti - get it right man and hire the street smart experts. Look at these darn stencils. It's as if they give it to their 1st grader as a take home assignment. One of these looks like a hammer head on a dog's body. Is this even legal? It seems like bernie goetz vigilante dog law writing. Finally, as a store owner you take responsibility for the sidewalk, eventhough you don't own it. 
All you have to do is take a few minutes out of your day and wash the sidewalk and all will be good. One of these places is a wine store. You would think a wine store would embrace lonely dog owners - seems like a high potential customer to me. I like right next store to the angry wine store owner where there is a free watering hole for dogs. If I were a dog i'd fill up right before walking by the wine store.. We all know what Triumph would say on this one.. This beautiful portrait of disproportional dogs is nice.... for me to poop on!
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March 14, 2005
Join My Class Action Suit
Why haven't I been blogging in a week or so? Because I am hard at work with my lawyers building a people vs baseball steroid users. You are saying I know we have all been had by juiced baseball players, doing the homerun bash during wiffle ball games and cheering on the Sosa-McGuire home run battle. Well I am taking a different angle on this and it is going to be my way to the financial freedom. You can compare this scenario to the fall of enron. In Enron they cooked the books similar to the way these baseball players cooked their muscles. As a result they got stuck with class action suits from pension funds, investors, etc. What's interesting in that scenario after they paid off all the lawyers there was probably no money left for you and me. Here is my case CRAZY 80's BASEBALL CARD COLLECTORS VS BASEBALL ROID HEADS!!- I am suing for the lost value of my investment in my Barry Bonds, Mark Mcguire and Jose Canseco rookie. These things are plummeting fast - you could get about 50 cents on ebay for this crap!! Kids who grew up in the 80's are getting screwed. I bet my dad's 1986 paycheck on the fact that barry bonds was going to be the homerun king!! my 86 topps traded set was supposed to buy my first vette!! I was a baseball card freak and I dragged my dad down with me. We were going to shows, buying pack after pack of cards, buying every brand that hit the market.. fleer, dunross, skybox, upper deck, topps. Well I shouldn't have to bear this loss and what's different about this compared to Enron is that bonds, mcguire and canseco have money - lots of it! I'm gonna get me some of it!
I'm suing for the amount i spent on baseball cards as compared to if I just had my dad buy me microsoft stock. I probably spent 10k of his money. If we had put that into microsoft when it went public in 86, instead of buying tons of packs of cards to get a canseco rookie, we would have 2.5 million dollars (7 million during the internet boom) I am suing for 2.5 million. Can you imagine how the guy who bought mcguire's record homerun feels? Wish me luck on this and sign up in the comments if you want to join my fight. Lawyers are standing by to take your calls. I'm going to be taking it to baseball parks across america!
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Back in CALI-FORNIA
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Going Back to CALI....... CALI.....
Alarm Clock Technology Advancement is needed!
March 2007
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March 06, 2005
Going Back to CALI....... CALI.....
While all my pals and fam is back east freezing, i'm soaking up the sun on my pale skin in San Diego! I was complete tourist guy today, taking a trolley tour and my camera. Great town and really has changed since i was here in high school. The downtown is condoville and they put a nice baseball stadium smack in the middle. Cali is a strange place to me.. very laid back and beautiful but doesn't feel like home. I guess I wouldn't have anything to complain about here so i wouldn't like it. I had to ditch into a bbq dive bar where Top Gun was filmed last night to feel at home. My plane ride here was ridiculous. I booked with us airways, when i got to the gate they told me it was us airways operated by united airlines. I had to walk all over LGA. Then it was cancelled so i had to re-route through denver.. Nightmare and now i know why both united and us airways are sinking fast. On a final note I ran into that native american flute band playing and selling their cd - wow those guys get around the whole country. I saw them rock time square just last week. Stay Warm!!!
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Back in CALI-FORNIA
The dog days of graffiti
Join My Class Action Suit
Going Back to CALI....... CALI.....
Alarm Clock Technology Advancement is needed!
March 2007
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Disclaimer: All the opinions here are my own and in no way represent any corporation I am associated with. It is the goal of this site to completely diverge from the type of work I do on a daily basis and do not comment on that topic.
March 05, 2005
Alarm Clock Technology Advancement is needed!
Isn't it amazing that we have nanotechnology, can clone sheep and send videos from our phones, but an alarm clock still can't tell that you are not in the room after an hour! I would like to thank my neighbor for setting their alarm clock for 8am on a saturday and then leaving for the weekend! I would also like to thank the downstairs neighbor for leaving their dog, who heard the alarm clock and barked to the beat. The most you can spend on an alarm clock is 179 bucks. We need new alarm clocks that do some simple logic. If you do not wake up in 15 minutes you are either really hung over or not there.
Posted by Patrick at 09:30 AM | Comments (2)
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Back in CALI-FORNIA
The dog days of graffiti
Join My Class Action Suit
Going Back to CALI....... CALI.....
Alarm Clock Technology Advancement is needed!
March 2007
September 2006
August 2006
July 2006
May 2006
April 2006
August 2005
July 2005
June 2005
May 2005
April 2005
March 2005
February 2005
January 2005
December 2004
November 2004
XML Syndication
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Disclaimer: All the opinions here are my own and in no way represent any corporation I am associated with. It is the goal of this site to completely diverge from the type of work I do on a daily basis and do not comment on that topic.